Call me a cab and tell me you love me

Good morning once more. This kind of thing seems to happen again and again, week after week, year after year, doesn't it? It might be nice to wake up to dusk once in ones lifetime, but no matter. That way you wouldn't even have to get out of bed. In any case it will be Friday in four days so gear up and hang on.
Credited to www.quotations page, enjoy a little of our favorite New York misanthrope, Ms. Fran Lebowitz with your Monday am hot coffee and regrets of the weekend.
Dedicated to Bootsy Leibowitz, Getrude and any divorced woman with triplets in tow. We're in this together honey.

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
Fran Lebowitz
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Children]
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
Fran Lebowitz
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Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Drinking]
Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
Fran Lebowitz
I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Children]
I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Drugs]
I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.
Fran Lebowitz
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Pets] [Dogs]
In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
Fran Lebowitz
Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Life] [Sleep]
My favorite animal is steak.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Food]
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Pets]
Special-interest publications should realize that if they are attracting enough advertising and readers to make a profit, the interest is not so special.
Fran Lebowitz
Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Success]
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
Fran Lebowitz
Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.
Fran Lebowitz
- More quotations on: [Writing]
Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
Fran Lebowitz, Metropolitan Life, 1978
- More quotations on: [Humility]
Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
Fran Lebowitz, Social Studies (1981)